Saturday, September 12, 2020
I wasn’t sure what to do this morning.
There’s a lot of heartbreaking news that’s been building up...from deadly fires to bizarre validation of insane Qanon conspiracies from criminal Republicans cheating to win to a breathtakingly incompetent government to...
I just can’t.
I feel everything, I worry about everything, and I’m crying all the time these days.
Watching freaking YouTube videos of bands I love this morning is even making me weep.
Ew, I feel like it’s back to the monthly period years and I can’t even take an Advil or a tranquilizer because I have ulcers and a past history of Valium abuse.
Anyway, I’m giving myself a day off from doom and gloom today.
Instead I’m going to talk about this.
Last night, Gary and I finished dinner, I was back on the sofa cursing the President on Twitter and Gary was in the kitchen cleaning up (yeah, I know, I don’t believe it either). I saw something move out of the corner of my eye.
What the fuckity fuck.
And then I saw him.
“Omg! Gary! It’s him! Ack! gah! Omg! Help! Help!”
Welp, it kinda went like that except with me also shrieking and pointing and jumping up and down and our brave dog Jake Slick running upstairs.
I scared the hell out of Gary, who dropped the large pot he was washing, sending terrified Jake from the stairs to Julie’s bedroom.
Gary ran into the living room with the big scissors he uses to cut lettuce as a weapon.
“WHAT IS IT?”
“It’s the raccoon! It’s eating out of the bird feeder! Don’t stab him!!! Put the scissors down!”
“Jesus christ, you gave me a fucking heart attack over a raccoon? I believed you! I told you I’ve seen him! You just scared the crap out of me!”
“Don’t kill him!”
“I’m not going to kill a cute little raccoon! What the hell is wrong with you? The way you just screamed, I thought someone was in our yard!”
“And you were going to attack him with scissors?”
Omg, he was in the kitchen. We have big scary knives!
Wait. What the hell am I talking about.
Oy.
Anyway, after he stopped yelling at me for scaring him to death, we took pics.
I’m too lazy to download the photos from Gary’s fancy camera, here’s the one I took on my phone.
That little bastard sat there for an hour staring at us because Gary thought it was cool to turn the lights on in the yard so we could watch him all evening.
Who knew what really goes on in downtown Philadelphia at night?
Raccoons partying.
2020, man.
Expect the unexpected.
So I don’t know what today’s plan is, we may be taking a drive to Princeton if Gary wakes up before lunch but I kinda want alone time after the brutal day at work I had yesterday so I’m gonna let him sleep and whatever happens, happens.
As long as I have french fries and mushroom pizza “steaks” for dinner.
New vegan favorite- put raw mushrooms in an egg slicer so they’re sliced way thin and uniform, place on baking tray, drizzle with olive oil and I actually bought vegan “bacon” spice but you can use smoked paprika, and you just roast the crap out of them on a high heat.
I munch on them, throw them in salad, but my new favorite is to put them on a roll with Gary’s roasted tomato sauce and there you have it, a pizza “steak.”
With french fries on the side.
Sooo good.
Is it dinner time yet?
Okay, I just realized it’s almost 7:30 a.m. I gots to do my Saturday morning chores and watch Season 4 of Top Chef.
Behave yourselves.
Never mind, don’t. Have some amazing fun!
Happy Saturday!
Happy Saturday!
