Wednesday, April 22, 2020

Day 38

Day 38, self quarantine:

Happy Earth Day!  You know, as a disgruntled boomer, I must point out we are the ones who started Earth Day.

I just wanted to make sure people are aware we’re not just responsible for a stunningly ignorant president and the end of the world.

So yesterday Gary asked me, “What’s wrong?”  He asks me that at least 50 times a day - apparently I make strange faces when I’m reading and/or thinking.

And of course, nowadays there IS a lot wrong.

I repeated my big concern.

“I don’t like all this return to work May 1 stuff.”

“I thought you just told me May 8?” 

“I don’t like May 8 either,” I said.  “I’m honestly not comfortable until June 1, after Memorial Day weekend.”

Gary looked at me and shrugged.

“So don’t go back until June 1.

“Really?”

“Rob.  You can do whatever you want.  Stay home forever if that’s what you’re thinking.  Just try and be happy and normal, okay?”

I can do that?   Well, maybe not the normal part. (Neither can Gary - he immediately broke out into singing the Safety Dance, “You can dance if you want to”)

But he’s right.

It’s that simple.

Holy cow, when did I get a beaten employee mentality?  Haha I made some spectacularly poor career decisions in the past 15 years including working for someone who hurled a staple gun in my direction when she was hungover, and another job where the senior partner crawled under his desk and wouldn’t come out until we called an ambulance.

I guess I was affected after all.

I slowly took in Gary’s comment again.  I can do whatever I want.  

Whoa.  Major life changing revelation.

Yay, quarantine.  I’m a new woman!

Not.  It’s too late for that, I’m too damaged 😎

But I do wonder about all the time I spend overanalyzing things and worrying, despite my brag that I always live in the now.  Yesterday was the perfect example.  I channel surfed the news and web throughout the day looking for news on when the quarantine would end with a knot in my stomach.  I basically made myself nuts for no reason.

All I had to do was say to myself, “I don’t care, I’m not leaving the house until June 1 and that’s that.”

Ugh, why do I always make everything so complicated?

If I could only just say and do what I feel as easily in the real world as I can writing it here.

That being said, I am not the only one benefiting from journal writing during this apocalypse.  According to Time Magazine, we should all be keeping coronavirus journals.


Pretty cool, huh.

It’s always nice to be validated.

Have an awesome Earth Day.  Say something nice to a boomer today.