Sunday, November 11, 2007

Bitten to the Core

The girl in the above sketch is smiling. I am not. But it was the best I could come up with.

God, Bitten to the Core is a great name for my new novel in so many ways, but it's literally the way I feel after the marathon writing session that is National Novel Writing Month. Okay, so as of this morning, I have 14,600 words, and the whole sorry first draft in progress is up on their site right here...and normally 14,600 words since November 1, 2007 would be most impressive except for the fact that...arghhh...if I want to keep pace I need 20,000 words by the time I go to bed tonight.

ETA: Yes! As of 4:45 p.m., I have 16,800 words! Yay me!

ETA #2: Make that 18,136 words at 7:38 p.m. I'm blind! Help me! (I can't freaking believe I'm doing this. I blame Susan Henderson at Lit Park. If so many other Lit Parkers weren't doing this, I'd probably have given up by now but personal pride, man, it's is my competitive streak. I don't dare fail now. Okay, back to my original blog post of this morning, which is not all that true anymore -- I think I've figured out my plot! Yay!

Wait: ETA #3 - 18,383 at 9:10 p.m., which, by my calculations, puts me right on track. Which is good because I can't type another word. But yeah, today is November 11, and I'm supposed to be hitting 1,666 words a day. So 1,666 x 11 = 18,326. Which makes me 57 words ahead. Oh god, I'm going to get very drunk now. Just in time for Julie and Eric to arrive home and see their mom turn into total mush brain. But oh do I have a good excuse! Damn I feel good right now, even without the alcohol. I freaking did it!

This would be a piece of cake for me normally IF I HAD ANY FUCKING IDEA OF WHERE I WAS GOING WITH THIS PLOT...sorry...I scream when I'm frustrated. So I woke up early to brainstorm, Gary won't be awake until noon, Julie and Eric are still in Nashville and their flight home doesn't arrive until 9:00 p.m. tonight, so there is absolutely no reason I should be staring at the page right now totally clueless.

Okay, I do know what I want, it's just a matter of making it funny as opposed to offensive, which is a fine line when you are writing erotica, and who in their right mind attempts comedic erotica? I managed to do it in Three Days and Another Bite but for this third book in the series, it's hard to keep the character fresh and funny and not jaded by all of her "experiences"...and here's the kicker...I have to somehow think up a plan for our two lovers in question to be in a slapstick situation with a bunch of busybody church ladies. See what I mean about crossing that politically correct line? Hmmm, that's the wrong word to use. I could give two fucks if I'm politically correct...what I need is to make it believable and laugh out loud funny.

I guess the idea of a dungeon in the church basement complete with chains, shackles, and whips where they kidnap our heroine and hero and torture them in, um, unusual ways won't work, huh. Though I should warn you I have not completely given up on that idea...

Oh I'm kidding. At least I hope I'm kidding. Because if I can't come up with anything else...argh...

So while I sit at my computer all miserable and frustrated and searching, searching, searching, I figured I'd do a warm up exercise by coming back to my absolute favorite place to write -- i.e., this blog. And excuse all of the f notes I'm hurling here but I get emotional when I'm blocked, which isn't often thank God. (Being blocked that is....I obviously get emotional all the time, but it's usually in a good way)

Anyway, in much better news, I talked to Eric yesterday and they are having an amazing, amazing time at Adrian's house down in Nashville. Yesterday they recorded yet another brand new masterpiece and Eric sounded excited beyond belief. Both Julie and Eric are writing their own parts to certain songs and they are swooning over that. By the way, Gary and I played Side Four Live (yet again har har) yesterday and you should hear what those two little tricksters pulled in the live version of the song "Madness"...let's just say it's an awesome tribute to Robert Fripp. Gary was at that club in Kentucky when Side Four Live was recorded earlier this year, and he told me that when they launched into it on drums and bass about halfway through, Adrian turned to them in shocked delight and smiled ear to ear because they totally surprised him. So I hate to tease you all like that with the CD not being available for pre-order until next Tuesday, but you heard it here first...listen very closely during Madness. Actually, that would be "A Little Madness" as it's been renamed on Side Four Live. (Speaking of Robert Fripp, thank you, sir, for making me smile in delight at your diary entry of today, where you call the ABPT "The Adrian Belew Trio Of Power, Wonderment & Bliss Arising". You made my day -- and those photos of New York, etc. were awesome but the accompanying commentary had me laughing out loud)

Also, I'm hoping Ade posts a photo, but last night they all went to dinner at a friend of Ade and Martha...and I may be getting this wrong so I will have to check with Eric later and come in and correct this post if I am...but I believe they also dined with him Friday night at J. Alexander's...or, they may have run into him and then made plans for last night, I'm not sure. Anyway, the reason I'm telling you this is that having met him Friday night, they wanted to bring him and his wife, a brilliant artist (gah! I really hope I'm not screwing this story totally up) gifts of art when they went to dinner at their home last evening. So Ade and Eric took a drumhead and did wild things to it with spray paint. Eric said it's so incredible, I have to see it. So that's why I'm hoping they took a photo and Ade posts it in his blog. And what did Julie contribute to this plan? I am so freaking jealous. She made her famous key lime pie, which I am also hoping Ade took a photo of, though knowing Julie, she insisted.

You haven't experienced true nirvana until you have had a slice of Julie's key lime pie. And she is correct, it is a true work of art.

(Julie? You are baking that for Thanksgiving dinner this year, right? Right? Right?)

Anyway, okay, my fingers are nimble, I've had two cups of's time to return to my trainwreck...I mean...novel in progress.

Now. What to do with that bunch of angry church ladies....



Pete Franke said...

haha, robin I can't imagine what goes on in that head of wait, I just did! and its got gangbang church ladies in it!!

oh, my eyes, my burning eyes!!!

Good luck with that 'fine line' thing, I think you are going to need it :-D

Robert Fripp ran the spectrum from static to inspiring to downright crunchy at the WCL, you should have gone. My friends needed to leave soon after the gig but on returning from their car I met 6 of the guitarists behind the venue and chatted with them for awhile. Alas, Robert never came out to say hello ;-D Well, actually I think he exited via rooftop heliport or something...


belewbloggfan said...

Hey Rob!
Screw the politically correct line!
Those who read your 'comedic erotica' are certainly not standing in the politically correct line whilst awaiting their turn to vote for George Dubbya!
I personally thought the church basement dungeon idea was brilliant - and not really all that far from the truth, I'm sure! Ha!
Even better, I REALLY like Pete's church ladies/gangbang idea! LOL!
Oh sorry....ahem.... read 'Comedic erotica'....not smut! - oooh lift my frilly black maids uniform and spank me....
Oh dear, have I just plumbed some dark new depths...
sorry - pretty lame hey (just glad that your the writer - obviously - and not me)
Can't wait to read your next 20,000 words!

LitPark said...

Did you draw that?

I'm thrilled about your word count. I've been writing all day and refuse to go to bed tonight without feeling like I've made good progress.

I've always wanted to try key lime pie, but I think it has one of those ingredients in it that would put me into anaphylactic shock.

Okay, I'm just taking a two minute break. Back to my book. xo

Pete Franke said...

LOL! Wendy, as a fellow Gemini, I can tell you that these thoughts you are having are perfectly normal. Normal for a Gemini, that is! ;-D. Personally, I think classic illustrations of the Gemini twins should have them making out with each other, hahaha!

cheers and thanks for the laugh hey! :-)

Robin, good luck with your book-a-thon, you crazy author, you! Break a quill!


Kimberly M. said...

euf! I'm so proud of you writing that much in one day! after a power session of just over 3700 today, I'm dead. in fact, I'm typing this with my nose because my fingers are about to fall off.

asdfghjkl[poijhgfc (I sneezed, sorry)


RobinSlick said...

Ugh, Pete, Kim, Wendy -- don't tell me you guys actually read that draft...kill me now, please. But at least I'm doing this crazy "exercise", which is why I felt compelled to post the link as proof. I thank you all for your kind words and yeah, I have figured out a way to incorporate the church ladies in a funny but bittersweet way so whew...that's one plot fix I don't have to worry about.

Sue, all key lime pie is, if you make it correctly, is fresh key limes whipped with sweetened condensed milk and topped with real whipped cream. I know you can eat whipped cream (insert smiley face emoticon here) so you should be okay...maybe I'll send you one of Julie's for Christmas if I can figure out packaging.

You guys are all funny and cracked me up yesterday/this morning when I read your comments. I really appreciate the support so thanks again. Okay, off to do another 3,000 words today

Kimberly M. said...

I haven't read it all (did I mention my eyes are bleeding too???)

But I got a good start last week. I left off right after she and the poet get back from their walk on the beach.

Can't WAIT to hear what happens with the church ladies! I went to bed last night thinking about previously repressed Catholic memories of robes, inscence and so many things that would condemn me to hell if I believed in any of that and didn't think I'd prbably have more fun there anyway!

Write on, sister friend! I'm hoping I'll catch up with you soon! (both in word count AND in person!)


LitPark said...

Are you serious?? And all this time, I've been avoiding it, thinking there was sour cream or something in it?! Man, I am sure looking forward to Christmas now.

Having a clunker writing day, but if I can push through, I'll be skating for a while.

RobinSlick said...

I checked with Julie, Sue - the only other ingredient are egg yolks and yeah, she bakes this and in a graham cracker crust which is just butter, sugar, and graham crackers. If you can eat these ingredients, I am crazy enough to box one up when you, Kim and I meet in NY (which I hope is soon because I adore New York decorated for Christmas)and then there are also the famous Slick Christmas mailing list for those gets larger every year and we're probably going to start baking this weekend. Like how I say "we"? That would be Gary. But I taught him everything he knows.

Sue, I cannot believe it but I just typed word number 20,142 since November 1 at Nano. I feel like I can't breathe. Now. If only it wasn't total crap!

(Though it was easy today with LitPark being down. What's going on? I need my fix!)

Kimberly M. said...

Not that you offered, but please don't bring me a key lime pie... I got the WORST food poisioning I've ever had in my life (and I've had it three times) from Key Lime Pie. Eggs went bad after too many hours in the Florida sun.

Calling dibs on Slick Family Cookies,tho', and am will trade secret Wetherell Red Velvet recipe in exchange... (Sue, is buttermilk on the icky-white-food list?)

Aimeepalooza said...

I am so envious of you. I'm at like 12,000 words and I did nothing but watch TV today. It's raining and I'm feeling blah.

I think you should have them go to a restaurant, have a couple drinks and run off and hide in the stall of the women's bathroom...and then have the church ladies pop in and see the mans shoes.

I could tell you the whole story because it happened at the restaurant I work in but instead of 1 couple in the stall it was two and instead of church ladies it was me.

Aimeepalooza said...

link to sex in the bathroom story
My quote is not 100% correct but the gist of it is.