Showing posts with label Ellen Meister. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ellen Meister. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

The Awesome Writer Post



The beautiful Hyatt Hotel, where I'll be attending a book convention and signing in three weeks

So since there is a rare lull in music news in the Slick household and it's suddenly occurred to me that I'll be traveling across the country in a few weeks to party, network, sell and sign books with authors and fans from literally all over the world for five crazy, fun-filled days here, I thought I would point out a few authors who are really, really special and talented and make my soul rise. But before I do that, oh god, I just realized that because we are assigned alphabeticallly to "signing tables" at the book fair, I will be sitting next to the infamous Christina Skye. She's a most interesting woman with thousands and thousands of fans so while people snake in long lines for her autograph, I can only hope I pick up her overflow. Note to self: Buy lots of chocolate to hand out. I'm serious. Christina is terrific and it's kind of humbling to watch her fans approach her one by one, some unable to speak because they're so choked up over the profound effect her books have had on them. Cool, huh?

Anyway, back to some friends of mine.

First of all, I make no secret that I'm a big Theresa Boyer fan and I was thrilled to nominate her brilliant story, Waxing Razal for the Million Writers Award. Seriously. Read that story and learn from a master. Or mistress. Ha. Whatever.

Also, had she not already been nominated, I would have also put in a vote for Kat Denza and her incredible piece, Snake Dreams. Another must read and I see it was the lst runner up in the Storyglossia Fiction Prize, 2006.

Another amazing story comes courtesy of Richard Grayson entitled La Difficulte d'Etre. After you read Richard's short story, click on the link to his bio where I guarantee you will be completely spellbound.

Some of my pals have been interviewed lately as well.

Author Kelly Spitzer interviews Dave Clapper.

Dave is the editor/founder of Smokelong Quarterly, which, as I've said on many occasions, is probably one of the finest 'zines out there, along with Juked. Both Dave and John Wang, editor of Juked, have an incredible eye for literature and can tell the difference between talent and "unstructured, ungrammatical, airheaded shit". (I'm quoting a friend who shall remain nameless because he threatened to kill me if I mention him in my blog. Just kidding...but he knows I love his lines and steal them whenever I can)

While you are on Kelly's website, please also read her sparkling conversations with four of my other favorite writers -- here are the links:

Interview with Ellen Meister;

Interview with Alicia Gifford;

Interview with Kathy Fish;

Interview with Mary Akers.

These are not only brilliant women but extremely classy ones -- people who neither flaunt their talent nor whine about themselves or the publishing world -- they are graceful, lovely people and it's a joy to know them and read their work.

Also interviewed this month is my usual favorite suspect, Susan Henderson, who gives us yet more insight into her incredible mind over at Insolent Rudder, and while I was lifting that link, I saw that the insanely fabulous Jeff Landon is the author spotlight this quarter and let me tell you, that is one funny man and one hell of a terrific writer. I strongly suggest you google him, as well as the others mentioned like Alicia Gifford, Kathy Fish et al and read a lot of their work. You'll not only have a wonderful read but again, you may even learn something.

I know I've left some people out -- take a look at my reading recommendations on the right hand side, for one thing -- but it's early and I've got to fly for now -- so there will definitely be "The Awesome Writer Post - Part II" coming your way in the very near future. Count on it!

Later,
xo

Sunday, March 11, 2007

And here I thought all the best jokes were about blondes...


This is how I know I really am a dork. I saw this on someone's live journal page and lifted it because I think it's cool.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm not just a mere dork, I'm an uber geek. Oh well. It could be worse.

Okay, first let's dispense with the writing stuff.

I personally find the following hilarious, but with all due respect, maybe you have to actually be a writer to fully appreciate them:

A writer died and was given the option of going to heaven or hell.

She decided to check out each place first. As the writer descended into the fiery pits, she saw row upon row of writers chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they were repeatedly whipped with thorny lashes.

"Oh my," said the writer. "Let me see heaven now."

A few moments later, as she ascended into heaven, she saw rows of writers, chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they, too, were whipped with thorny lashes.

"Wait a minute," said the writer. "This is just as bad as hell!"

"Oh no, it's not," replied an unseen voice. "Here, your work gets published."
*****

True story:

Sinclair Lewis arrived at Harvard - drunk, as usual - to talk about his craft.

"Hands up, all those who want to be writers!" he yelled. Everyone's hand went up.

"Then why the hell aren't you at home writing?" he asked, and staggered off the platform.

*****
Q: How many copy editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: I can't tell whether you mean 'change a light bulb' or 'have sex in a light bulb.' Can we reword it to remove the ambiguity?
*****

Q: How many editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Only one. But first they have to rewire the entire building.
*****

Q: How many managing editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: You were supposed to have changed that light bulb last week!
*****

Q: How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Does it HAVE to be a light bulb?
*****

Q: How many copy editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: The last time this question was asked, it involved art directors. Is the difference intentional? Should one or the other instance be changed? It seems inconsistent.
*****

Q: How many marketing directors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: It isn't too late to make this neon instead, is it?
*****

Q: How many proofreaders does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Proofreaders aren't supposed to change light bulbs. They should just query them.
*****

Q: How many writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: But why do we have to CHANGE it?
*****

Q: How many publishers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Three. One to screw it in, and two to hold down the author.
*****

Q: How many booksellers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Only one, and they'll be glad to do it too, except no one shipped them any.
*****

A screenwriter comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing and slightly-singed wife is standing outside.

“What happened, honey?” the man asks.

“Oh, John, it was terrible,” she weeps. “I was cooking, the phone rang. It was your agent. Because I was on the phone, I didn’t notice the stove was on fire. It went up in second. Everything is gone. I nearly didn’t make it out of the house. Poor Fluffy is--”

“Wait, wait. Back up a minute,” The man says. “My agent called?”

*****

Thanks to one of my favorite authors, Maryanne Stahl, for turning me on to these.

And speaking of my extraordinary writer pals, here's something I received in my email from Ellen Meister, and my only regret is that I'm exempt, though how weird is this, my name is already a character in a Canadian play...I tried to find the link on Google which I discovered around six months ago but gave up...anyway, that Robin Slick was a man and I remember something about him being "greasy" which naturally did not exactly thrill me but I stil couldn't get over it.

Oh what a surprise, I went off track for a change. Focus, Robin. Okay.

Here's what Ellen has to say:

"Hi! I'm happy to announce a new promotion I'm calling the ...

"I Want A Freaking Character Named After Me!" Drawing

At last, the opportunity to curse like an angry housewife and have a chance to be immortalized in print ... all with one simple email.

Anyone who's read Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA will have an easy time entering. Here's how it works ...

1) Send an email to me at win(at)ellenmeister(dot)com

2) In the subject line, type in Maddie's favorite multi-syllable curse

3) In the body of the email, type in your name as you'd like it to appear in my next book

That's it! After May 31, 2007, all entries with the correct curse phrase will be entered into a drawing. One lucky winner will get a character named for them in my next novel.

Good luck ... and happy cursing!

Ellen

P.S. One entry per person, and you must be 18 or over.

Ellen Meister, author of Secret Confessions of the Applewood PTA. Visit my website at www.ellenmeister.com."

*****

I think Ellen's contest is absolutely brilliant, don't you?

You know, I've said many times that I hate religion and profess to be a heathen but there is more and more growing evidence that I do in fact have a higher power, and his/her humor just keeps getting more and more twisted. I have absolutely nothing lined up until the summer in both writing and I'm-a-groupie-for-my-kids world except a book convention on the other side of the country from April 25-29, which I mentioned here on Friday. So what do I read in Neil Gaiman's journal this morning?

"Seeing the Village Voice has just leaked it, and a few of you have written to ask about it, yes, I will be a Guest at the PEN World Voices Festival at the end of April. I can't give you any other details right now, but the curious should go here and sign up for the Festival mailing list for more information."

Naturally, this is from April 25-29 in New York City, an hour and fifteen minutes from my house. Sob...and you can bet that all of my New York writer pals -- like the currently missing in action Susan Henderson will be there sipping martinis and hanging with Neil while I'm on the other side of the country partying with faeries and vampires.

Yeah, that sounds about right.

Speaking of Susan, man it's been a long week without her. Poor baby has been on a five star Caribbean cruise as per her website, which, thank God, says she'll be back tomorrow where I suspect it will be business as usual with the ever so coy Susan not giving us any details as to where and why.
*******
Finally in writing news, a HUGE congratuations to fellow Phaze author Alessia Brio, who took top honors last night at Epicon, winning best erotic e-book of 2006. Actually, I see a lot of Phaze authors on that list so...yay!!!!
******
Music news:

Eric has some jazz gigs coming up...one with amazing sax player Elliott Levin and something else with someone fairly major in jazz world that I'm not allowed to blab about yet because while it's pretty much a done deal, it's not entirely official yet so Eric asked me to keep quiet.

But yeah, Eric is also playing Bonnaroo and looking over that list, I'm not sure who he is playing with...I only know it involves bongos and belly dancers and his all access backstage pass enables to hang out with all of the bands mentioned.

"Oh, hi, Sting, nice to meet you but please do me a favor and put that fucking lute down before I crack it over your head and shove the splinters up your nose, okay?"

That's me speaking, not Eric. Eric is far too polite and kind.

You may have noticed I haven't mentioned Julie lately...that's because she's finishing her senior year at Drexel U and is buried deep in her thesis/senior project. In fact, I haven't even seen her for a couple of days but my straight A student/rock star also works at a fabulous restaurant a few nights a week so I think Gary and I may pop in on her tonight -- she takes really good care of us and I admit it, I get a vicarious thrill having her wait on me for a change.

Finally, congratulations to Scott Abernethy, who won the honor of having his artwork appear on Adrian Belew's Dust CD Collection and here's his award winner:



Pretty cool, huh.

So that covers it for today, I think, but who knows...as usual, if I get any interesting news, and trust me, I'm waiting on several things (again, as usual), I'll be back.

Later,
xo

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Back by popular demand....



Ha ha - I figured I didn't want to drive everyone nuts or worse, bore you to tears with daily photos of my kids and Adrian Belew (not that Adrian could ever be boring...oh my god, I hope you all read his blog every day -- he really does rock in every way possible) so I went shuffling through my various photo sites and found this one from a couple of years ago in NYC which I've probably posted before but I can't remember. The beautiful redhead planting one on my cheek is my "fellow" writer pal Maya whose dad was in the Allman Brothers so like, we have that in common (musician fathers from whom we are alienated har har) and no, no, it's not what you are thinking. We were talking books, shopping, and err...you know what? I think we might have been hamming it up for Ellen who at that time was telling us about this new novel she'd written and how she was trying to find an agent. Basically, that's what we talked about all through breakfast -- agent queries. And now look at us. A couple of years later and we're all like, an agent, ha ha, that's just step two out of a thousand more. Oh. Step one is actually writing something worthwhile. After that it's a total free-fall altogether.

By the way, notice I am wearing my black Nano t-shirt...that year I actually did complete a 50,000 word novel during the month of November. I did it three times...four if you count my current book, but then again, that's taken me two Nanos' to finish so I'm not sure if it counts or not.

Anyway, as you can tell, I've rejoined the living and apparently do not have anything fatal after all, though on Sunday you could have fooled me. I mean, Saturday night I was fine...in fact, I was better than fine, I was awesome. Why? We went out to dinner, it was good, I had one glass of a really fine wine...then at midnight we tuned into radio station WNKU 89.7 and listened to the world's coolest disc jockey, Jeff Menke. He was at the Adrian Belew Power Trio show in Newport, KY for the recording of Side Four Live and he met up with Gary there, gave him his card, and told him he'd be playing Beatbox Guitar on his show this past Saturday and that we could hear the show via the internet. He said he was so blown away by the trio that he'd be talking them up on his program so that was all I had to hear -- I didn't even care that his show ran from midnight until 2:00 a.m. when I am usually dead to the world. Jeff is my new hero. Get a load of of what this man's got on his playlist:

The Beatles Come Together 1
The Zombies Time Of The Season Best Of The Zombies
John Lennon #9 Dream Walls And Bridges
Don Byron Bounce Of The Sugar Plum Faries / Powerhouse Bug Music
Todd Rundgren / Jeff Baxter Something To Fall Back On With A Little Help From My Friends
Queen Bohemian Rhapsody A Night At The Opera
David Bowie / Rick Wakeman Space Oddity Changesbowie
Ric Hickey And The Loose Wrecks Afterthoughts 2006
Adrian Belew Power Trio Beat Box Guitar Single
Gentle Giant All Through The Night Civilian
The Mothers Of Invention The Return Of The Son Of Monster Magnet Freak Out
Frank Zappa Drowning Witch Ship Arriving Too Late...
Pink Floyd One Of These Days Meddle
Dread Zeppelin I Can't Quit You Babe Un-Led-Ed
Primus My Name Is Mud Pork Soda
Colosseum II The Inquisition War Dance
10cc Blackmail The Original Soundtrack
Todd Rundgren Eastern Intrigue / Initiation Back To The Bars
The Allman Brothers Band Stormy Monday The Fillmore Concerts
Dixie Dregs Jessica California Screamin'
The J. Geils Band First I Look At The Purse Anthology
Edgar Winter's White Trash Tobacco Road Roadwork
Z Z Top Thunderbird Fandango
Frank Zappa Big Swifty / City Of Tiny Lights Make A Jazz Noise Here
Yes And You And I YesYears Vol. 4
King Crimson Frame By Frame B'Boom
The Who We're Not Gonna Take It / Summertime Blues Woodstock 1969
Dread Zeppelin Heartbreaker The Song Remains Insane

Man, look at those awesome tunes. And to think I've probably slept with half of the musicians in those bands....

Ha! Just kidding. But someone from a indie newspaper emailed me again about this little Robin Slick/Pamela DesBarre/Bebe Buell groupie article and no, I'm not going to give you the Hungarian translation again...okay, you twisted my arm, it says I'm still cool even if they've been unable to unearth a plaster cast with my signature on it.

Okay, they didn't say I was cool, they said I was coy.

Oy.

Anyway, getting back to the fabulous Jeff, he did in fact play Beatbox Guitar, then went on to say that he has been around music for a long time (in fact, in a subsequent email, he told me he had tickets to see the Beatles but oh my god, they were cancelled due to inclement weather)...anyway, yeah, he's a fellow musicologist and he said very little comes down the pike today which makes him speechless and that's the way he felt when he saw Julie and Eric play with Adrian. He said he literally walked around for three days unable to talk because he was on such a high from the show. Funny story -- when he first started talking about the kids, he said "I, um, think they're from Pittsburgh" and of course Gary and I could not let that one pass so I said to Gary, "Hey, why not call him and say Hi and tell him that Julie and Eric are from Philadelphia! Gary does not have to be asked something like that twice, so like at 1:00 a.m. he called Jeff up and it was so totally cool - the two of them talked; Gary put me on the phone because Jeff reads my blog all the time (yes, I know. I'm not only right up there with Pamela DesBarre, I'm also giving Arianna Huffington a run for her money). After we hung up, Jeff not only told his listeners about our call, he went on to talk up the Belew Power Trio even more...and even gave everyone the name/link to my blog.

Trust me on this -- listening to Jeff Menke on Saturday nights at midnight is going to be a new weekly tradition in this house. Unfortunately, his shows are not archived but his set lists are and oh man, why isn't he here in Philadelphia? Our radio stations truly, truly suck. Well, I guess if you are into Blue Oyster Cult, rap music, or that idiot Rush Limbaugh you're in good shape, but if you have any taste at all, you are shit out of luck here. Which for a major city is just pitiful. Oh wait. That's the U.S. in general these days, huh. So lacking in good taste it's embarrassing. At least you get to hear some tasty indie stuff on internet radio but it would be nice if there was still such a thing as "underground F.M.". And if you know what I mean by that, well, you are probably, like me, sob...born before 1970.

Here's the link to listen live.

So yeah, we were totally stoked that night; we went to bed around 2:30 a.m., I felt great, and then an hour later, I woke up...oh my god, I thought I was dying. I literally could not even hold down a glass of water and every joint in my body ached beyond belief. As I tossed and turned, I considered the possibilities. Flu? Yeah, but usually you have some warning about that...like a scratchy throat the day before or a bad headache. Food poisoning? Nah, I didn't eat anything weird, and like I said, I only had one glass of wine. So it's now like 4:00 a.m. and I've now thrown up like six times in an hour and I figured this was it...you don't even want to know the morbid fantasies I entertained. But you know I was deathly ill if I was too sick to even go on line all day Sunday and check my email...plus, I didn't want to start looking up my symptoms on the internet because I was positive the web would confirm what I already knew -- I had something fatal and my death would be quick but not painless.

Anyway, Gary was a fucking prince. He stood over me while I was sick and kept handing me fresh buckets lined with plastic bags while he wiped my forehead with cold compresses and asked every five minutes if I wanted to go to the hospital. No, I did not want to go to the e.r.; I preferred to die in my own home.

To make a long story at least a bit shorter, I was still sick as a dog on Monday but able to check my email, where I learned that one of my favorite magazines was advertising Three Days in New York City on their front page...and that magazine is Juked. If you didn't go there last week and read Myfanwy Collins' phenomenal story, do yourself a favor and head over there this instant!

Speaking of Myfanwy, I lifted this quiz Who Is Your Inner Rock Chick? off her blog...and as I told her, Oh god, that was sobering. You know why? None of those questions really applied to me. Not the clothes, not the hair, not any of the lyrics. There were no categories for "dresses all in black" "long wild blonde hair" and "As soon as you're born, they make you feel small" (Working Class Hero, John Lennon). Anyway...after answering the questions as best I could, here's what it said:

You Are Avril Lavigne!
A bit hardcore on the outside...
But sweet and sensitive on the inside.
"It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life"

Okay...if they say so.

While I'm still talking about music, sort of, and it's been what, a few paragraphs since I mentioned Adrian Belew, here's an extremely cool contest he's running at the moment: Have You Ever Wanted to Design An Album Cover?

Come on. You know you want to enter. Hey, if I wasn't connected to the band, I'd submit something for sure.

Okay, now that I've totally lost my train of thought...getting back to Monday, so yeah, I was starting to feel a little better but the room was still spinning and I still couldn't eat, which, if you know me at all, just doesn't happen. I can always force a little something down. To say I'm a foodie is putting it mildly. But I did walk away from the computer without going to Web M.D. and then the next thing I know, Eric looks at me and I notice he's white as a ghost.

"Mom...I don't feel so good..."

And so it really began in earnest...Eric all Monday night into Tuesday...and then Tuesday, an hour after leaving for work, Gary came bursting through the door in a cold sweat which later turned into the fever from hell (it's funny how this thing manifests itself differently in everyone it hit...Julie came down with it as well but with her it was more of an ache-y headcold kind of thing)...he'd hurled into a dumpster behind his office before coming home but that was it...and he was able to hold down liquids thank God which helped the fever. But you should have seen the three of us. We were really a sad, sad bunch.

The only good news is, as quick as this plague came upon us, it's gone, and we're all really skinny. I am determined to make this weight loss stick this time though to be honest, nothing rich or fattening really appeals to me at all...I'm fine with brown rice and steamed veggies.

Did I just say that? Holy cow, it's worse than I thought. I wasn't really sick; an alien entered my body. Help! I'm a pod person! Next thing you know, I'm going to be reading the Wall Street Journal, dressing in bright colors, and doing aerobics to seventies disco music.

Arghhhhhhhhhhh.

So let's see. What else do I need to tell you. Oh yeah, for those still reading (both this blog and in general), I got a very nice review of Another Bite of the Apple from the Romance Studio which I seriously think helped in my recovery this week. I am hoping to see Another Bite out in paperback with its brand new, incredibly cool cover out in the near future and of course will be posting the usual billboards across the universe when it does.

And just a reminder that I'm still accepting submissions for 39 and Holding...please don't be shy. The anthology is starting to fill up nicely...I've gotten a few stellar pieces, one from a very well known author, so you know you want to be a part of this incredible anthology, right? Right!

Finally, I know I don't have to remind anyone how much I love Lit Park, but you should really head over there this week...not only is there an interview with fabulous author Amy Wallen, there's also some really funny, funny stuff courtesy of author James Spring and a hilarious trip through Trader Joe's. Make sure you read the comments section for the posts on both Monday and Wednesday -- they alone are worth the price of admission.

What the hell did I just mean by that? Damn if I know. Okay, I'm starting to babble, which means it's time for me to go.

Oh. One final cool thing. I bought Julie a necklace from my new favorite jeweler, Natalie of Pashupatina who I met via the Fabulist, an incredible, incredible site which I was turned on to by...okay, give me a break, I haven't mentioned him in weeks, Neil Gaiman and I am linking his journal because he's had a very interesting dialogue going on this week about librarians and the right wing which is more than a little disturbing. Anyway, getting back to my original comment, when you click on the link for Pashupatina, on the left hand side you'll see another link for "customer photos". Click on that...and have a look at the very first photo you see.

Yes. I know. That is one gorgeous necklace. And one gorgeous daughter.

Later,
xo

Friday, February 23, 2007

Odds and Sods for Friday, February 23


Eric Slick, warming up for the Adrian Belew Power Trio show last Saturday

(Photo taken by either Julie or Gary Slick...no one is home for me to ask but I found it in my iPhoto folder this morning so it's one of them. Good job, J or G!)

So tonight Eric heads to New Haven, Connecticut, where he will perform at Cafe Nine with the fabulous Doctor Dark, a Captain Beefheart cover band Eric has been a part of since October, 2005. Yes, I know. I believe that makes at least six bands in which Eric is currently involved - seven if you count what he's doing tomorrow night - a private house party jam with master shredder Brian Davis. Ha ha - I just listened to Brian's MySpace song and to say my son is all over the map musically is putting it mildly. Oh...have I mentioned he's also playing bongos on a side stage at Bonnaroo with a bunch of belly dancers? A lot more on that to follow, as well as some veddy interesting jazz gigs my son has lined up with someone quite well known.

Writing news. If you want to be totally blown away, you must read this story by my good pal, Myfanwy Collins. It's over at one of my favorite 'zines, Juked, and, well, let me make it even easier for you -- here's a direct link to Myf's brilliant flash, entitled Celestial.

Oh my god, that story is so good I'm still smiling an hour after I first read it.

And, I see other friends have been more than a little busy. Ellen Meister has a great interview up at Trashionista - haha - love the name -- and Ellen has also entered the dreaded world of MySpace where, unlike me who has been faltering around that place and has still not been able to master it, she's very, very clever and has created a very cool site and sob...I'm jealous. Nah, just kidding...this blog alone is already eating up enough of my social life and writing time like you would not believe but I figure it's saved me thousands of dollars in psychotherapy so it's been worth it. Just kidding again. Where else can I kvetch about Republicans, tout my brilliant friends' works, and most importantly, have total control/bragging rights/unofficial publicist duties for my kiddies?

(SECTION DELETED)

Later,
xo